Friday, April 30, 2010
Walking to the pool this afternoon for my lunch break swim, I was happy. Content to be just walking, one foot in front of the other. Happy to be out in the Greek sun. I was in tune with everything around me...smells, sights, sounds. I was enjoying each second for what it gave me and not thinking about the seconds ahead nor the time that has passed behind me.
I got to the pool and swam for about 45 min. Light easy pace, concentration on my form and glide and watching the shiny reflection of the water ripples dance along the bottom of the pool. There was a beautiful little bird, black with blue striped wings, that joined me in my lane and dove down playfully to splash in the water. He was reminding me to have fun and be playful...enjoy the water.
Most of the time our brains are filled with stuff and 70% of that stuff will never happen. They are just thoughts and worries of "what if". I often stress about things that I need to do and I rush with trying to do a million things, to accomplish stuff and to check this stuff off my list.
Today's walk was a reminder that this universe holds my fate. I can work to make things good. I can work hard. I can make decisions and hope they are the right ones for my future but I ultimately have no control over this powerful universal force called life. I can either go with the flow or fight it. I can either enjoy each moment that life gives me or look too far ahead (or too far behind) and miss the moment. I can dwell on the "what if's" and miss out on "what is". Today I was able to live a bit "in" the moment...what is...
Monday, April 26, 2010
Why does everything have to have this overwhelming wave of emotions? I can go from one minute to the next and reach the full spectrum of feelings.
This morning I watched a youtube clip of "Empire state of mind" and immediately I wished that I was back in NYC...homesickness once again. A few hours before that I woke up to the most beautiful sunshine in Athens and opened the sliding glass door of my bedroom to overlook Ymmitos mountain. And even now, working from home in board shorts and flip flops, I can take a sunny outside lunch break and give some kisses to my pup pup (who comes to work with me every day). I have it kinda good!
This weekend was a full of giving back to the sport of love. I have decided to help volunteer and dedicate more than 1/2 of my time to two triathlon organizations, sacrificing both time and money for experience. I love being involved and giving back but there is a price to pay.
My price this weekend was my training. I am training for the biggest race of my life, thus far, which is only a month away - Ironman 70.3 St. Polten. YIKES! My weekend training was effected in a major way b.c I just ran out of time and steam. Saturday after an entire day of helping at the clinic and pouring my emotions into helping some newcomers have a good experience with the sport, I cut my run down from 22k to 15k and due to fatigue, re-injured my toe. On Sunday, after volunteering at the mountain trail running race, I could not keep my eyes open during the car ride home. Instead of doing my BIG brick session, I took a nap. Then, it was all I could do to jump on the trainer for a messily one hour bike, while counting the seconds until I was done the session. This not helping my athletic performance.
And on happiness, a friend of mine wrote on her FB status that she is looking for what really makes her happy, and that it is harder than you think. I replied saying that happiness comes from within and it is love. It can not be found in a situation, person or place. Happiness comes in waves...we just have to ride the wave. But it is harder than you think.
So with my heart and soul, I will keep giving and I will keep loving. I will have faith that with all of this, I will reap the fruits of my labor for when my time comes to be back in my USA.
NY...concrete jungle where dreams are made of, there is nothing you can't do...
Friday, April 9, 2010
Trying to ride high but life is getting in the way. So much to do and so little time. We live in a world with information overload and all these are distractions to me. I feel that I just can't organize to chip away at the important things...filter out the distractions and focus my energy on the things that will actually get me somewhere.
There is too much thinking and not enough doing. But I am doing. It is not like I am sitting all day long watching TV. But then, why am I so tired at the end of the day and why do I feel that what I have done is just not enough?
With every problem there is a solution. What is mine? I will start with the simple tasks and list technique. I will start to mimic those that are accomplishing great things. I will surround myself with like minded people.
After all, it is not that bad. I do have goals. I do have a path. It might not always be the day that I expect but I am doing something. With God on my side in just a few months I will hold the title of IRON-wo-MAN. This is one great accomplishment!